7 tips to turn suffering into a leader in an exceptionally crazy time!

Peter Verstoep | 01-04-2020

Before you read further, I would like to ask a question of conscience and it relates directly to yourself. That is the question: what does this time and situation do to you?

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Before you read further, I would like to ask a question of conscience and it relates directly to yourself.

That is the question: what does this time and situation do to you?

It seems clear to me why I started this, because this time affects all of us and forces us to approach things differently. Not because we want to, but because the situation forces us to!

Now I know from my 20 years of experience with Kenneth Smit how difficult behavioral change is for people in general, especially if you are forced to do so.

And speaking for myself, I know I'm definitely struggling with this situation. Limited contact with people…………. that is the biggest punishment you can give a trainer.

The other side of the story is that the “practice what you preach” principle also applies to us.

So there you are in a situation that you don't want, where you have to work completely differently from one day to the next. In good times I would have called it a “nice challenge”.

I'll leave the beauty behind for now and that's why I'll limit myself to “challenge”, which shows a bit more realism.

Then back to that question of conscience at the beginning, why is it so important now.

Suppose you answer that you actually experience this period as suffering, then you can never lead well in this situation. This has to do with the fact that you can see and hear it, which reinforces each other; you will see it physically and hear it in your words.

Nowadays, physical contact is limited, but the dangers of this time are that minimal social contact makes you feel increasingly worse. The first of the tips is about how to deal with this situation.

1. Plan tightly and in a disciplined manner, for example create a large board on which it is clear to all family members what will be done and when and agree on where you will do it.

Use smileys to indicate your mood today so that others can take this into account. If all the smileys show that the mood is very bad, go outside alone. I will come back to this later.

For example, it is not convenient to hold a conference call with colleagues in a central location in the house. Find a quiet place to do this, for example the bedroom. Make simple rules, such as 'do not disturb' when the door is closed.

Too simple for words, I hope so, because simple solutions are easy to apply, provided you have the discipline, because well... behavioral change remains difficult.

2. Don't make it prettier than it is, but feel free to vent your frustration (apologies for the use of words). Call a good friend and they will definitely ask you “how are you”? Then don't answer “good” but go all out with expletives of your own choosing. A good friend will listen to it and even though that's not really important at all, what matters is that you've lost it and it's so refreshing.

Before you let go, also make it clear that you are not looking for genuine, well-intentioned empathy such as “understand that you are having a hard time and....” or “understand that you feel worthless and.......”. Make it clear at the beginning that you are calling to get rid of the bullshit, once again, apologies for the word

3. This time consumes energy, change simply takes more energy instead of doing everything in accordance with certain known methods and methodologies.

The question then is where you get that from. This is different for every person, but there are a number of laws that always apply, but certainly now.

First the diet. It is of course tempting to snack extra or have a drink a little earlier, after all, we don't have to drive. That doesn't make you more vital.

I do enjoy sports and you can do that at home with your partner and/or children. Enjoy a workout together with all the modern torture devices that are in great demand, such as elastic bands, skipping ropes (can you still do them) and weights.

Exercising outside is of course preferable, but I realize that not everyone has that luxury. I can really enjoy myself in the garden and ………………, just an envious comment, I have the Veluwe in my backyard.

Anyway, enough about that because I'm writing this blog for you. But a comment like that is nice, I admit that.

That concludes the first three tips that can help you feel better about yourself again.

As a result, you can at least transform your own suffering into suffering. Much has been written about self-leadership, so grab it.

Then leadership to colleagues and others. The distance and lack of physical presence makes it quite difficult to gauge how your colleagues are doing at the moment.

As you may have noticed, I am writing here about colleagues and not about the manager-employee relationship and there is a reason for that.

The words “together” and “with each other” have been mentioned many times lately. A condition for this is equality and that you then have a different responsibility in these special times, I believe so.

That is why I consciously use the word colleagues. By using this myself, I create an atmosphere of equality and that is appreciated and experienced as social.

It is clear that it must be sincere.

With the above as a starting point, we come to your leadership to your felloww …………, sorry colleagues.

4. Be vulnerable, indicate that you find it all difficult because of your human nature and remember that being vulnerable is the pinnacle of strength.

And for a certain type of leader among us, remember that being vulnerable is different from weakness. Weakness in this day and age is not letting yourself be seen and heard.

Strength is showing and hearing more of yourself during this time.

5. Communicate with everything you have available, for example using all digital options for image and sound. Exude calm and share information about the measures you have taken as a company.

Sharing this information is very much appreciated because it provides clarity to the colleagues …………, sorry I almost went again, colleagues. Please realize that if you share and provide this information, you may also ask for something in return. Requesting a refund can consist of all kinds of things, such as: no overtime for a while, please take days off, postponement of holiday pay, etc.

So far my first blog (behavioral change) and I would like to hear what you think, because I know from my Kenneth Smit experience that there is always room for improvement.

And with my experience and knowledge, I would be happy to assist you, although I can well imagine that you are like “not right now”, then just do it and call.

I and my colleagues are independent and have a wealth of expertise that we are happy to share with you.

Because we realize that if you ever want to be able to multiply again after this particularly crazy time, you have to share a lot now.

Finally, the attentive reader counted and found that 5 and not 7 tips were given.

That's right, because if you want to share this message, I will contact you to give you the last two tips based on your specific situation.

Peter Verstoep
06-11396440
p.verstoep@kennethsmit.com
www.kennethsmit.com

View my Linkedin profile

 

 

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